When your favourite table gets termites and there is nothing you can do about it.

Instead of saying "have a nice day", think I'll start saying "Have the day you deserve." You know, let karma sort things out.

I like them thicc af. But Sir Newton, we can't write that! Then write this: The greater the mass, the greater the force of attraction.

I hate it when. I hate it when my dog and cat stole my fridge. I hate it when I go outside and someone randomly throws a fridge at me.

Men over 30 in skinny jeans.

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